10 Ways to still honor Her
In May 2009, I experienced my first Mother’s Day without my mother. The day was completely dreadful. I didn’t want to do anything, let alone celebrate anyone. My eyes would randomly fill with tears. My mind would run through many painful memories. And my heart, it was simply broken. Everyone around me was celebrating with their mother except me. Mine was no longer here. I mourned for more time with my mother. I longed for her hugs, smell and voice. The pain I felt cut deep. I often had people tell me, '“the pain of missing your mom will never go away but it will get easier to bear”. I’m happy to share it’s true. Yes, I still long for moments with my mother however I can say I finally found a way to enjoy Mother’s Day again. This Mother’s Day will be my 13th year without my mother. Even though my mother is no longer with me physically, I still make it a point to celebrate her. Without her sacrifices, love, commitment and care I wouldn’t be who I am today. The mother I am is because of the seeds she planted in me long time ago. That’s worth celebrating. She is worth celebrating. I still honor my mother on Mother’s Day because I was blessed with a joyful, loving, selfless, no nonsense kind of momma. The kind of mother that loved without boundaries. The kind of mother that stood up for what she believed. Ultimately, the kind of mother I long to be. I honor her because there ain’t no momma like the one I got! And I imagine many people feel the same about their own momma.
I share this with you to encourage all my fellow sisters/brothers who have lost their mother. I remind you that Mother’s Day is a day for you, too. Honor you mother and boast on the treasure you gained because of your mother. Continue honoring her every single year. Be committed to celebrate your mother as long as you live. You are your mother’s legacy. Though it can be tough to push pass the pain of her not physically being here, we have a duty to honor her.
Here are a few ways you can honor her:
Honor her artistically by creating something beautiful. Write her a letter. Create a song, poem or painting. Choreograph a dance. Build a sculpture. Develop something with your hands that was generated by the heart.
Honor her moral deposits by starting a garden. Be intentional to plant something of value, beauty or meaning. Whether it’s in a pot or in the ground spend time nurturing it. As though seeds begin to sprout and grow remember the seeds she planted in you. They will grow in the right environment or die in the wrong one. Cultivate it.
Honor her culinary skills by cooking her favorite meal. If you can’t cook, no worries, visit her favorite restaurant. Or recreate her favorite dessert. Treat your taste buds to something that reminds you of your mom’s love and comfort.
Honor her servanthood by serving someone else. Do a small act with great love. Serve at a local hospital or shelter. Pick up groceries for a neighbor or friend in need. Carve out time to serve someone with your undivided attention. Serving is less about you and more about someone else’s needs.
Honor her presence by beautifying your home with her favorite flowers, scent or art work. Buy some candles. rearrange your pillows or put up various positive quotes. Mom’s have a lovely way of making her children feel good, loved and accepted. Bring that into your home.
Honor her rest by visiting her burial site. Although this can be tough embrace the moment. Reflect on where you are and what you currently feel. Replace her flowers, shed some tears and reflect on the angel you have. It’s okay to cry - you need to from time to time.
Honor her impact by creating a small memorial for her in your home. See the links below for a few memorial recommendations. Light a candle when you think of her. Allow the fragrance of a candle to create a new scent in the atmosphere of your home. Some days will be hard, so find ways to uplift yourself.
Honor her memory by sharing her with others. Take delight in sharing your favorite memories. Express what you miss about her. Think about what you gleaned from her. Talk about your mother as much as you like this day and every day. Only stop when you need a break or feel content.
Honor who she was by writing a letter to other women in your life that share similar characteristics as your mother. Call out the similarities. Explain why you value it. It’s a treat to see glimpses of your mother in other women who are close to you.
Finally, honor her faith and belief. If she was a believer, you have hope that your mother is in eternity with God, our heavenly father. No matter how your mother may have passed away, may you find peace in her earthy rest. She is very much alive and well. She’s watching over you ever so carefully now. May you find joy in her freedom from her earthling sufferings internally and externally. I pray your heart opens to know and receive God for yourself so you too may experience eternity with her.
