Today marks the beginning of a new norm. It seems so surreal that our nursing days are officially over! Leading up to this point I would hold my LO and say “our nursing days are almost over”. I know she didn’t fully understand but I was preparing us both for this transition. I have mixed feelings about it all; excitement, nervousness, sadness but overall gratefulness. I am grateful I was able to nurse my LO. I am grateful for this unforgettable journey. As I reflect on this experience I am reminded of my determination and commitment, the tears shed and sacrifices made and the lasting bond between mother and daughter.
Unfortunately, in all of our preparation for labor and delivery, I did not feel prepared for nursing. Frankly, I thought it would be no problems but honey!! No one told me about the pain of nursing until I was facing it. It really was a unique experience. I once heard a mother on a TV series say her nipples felt like chew toys, sadly I understand exactly what she meant. It was no joke. Thankfully, I was blessed with a lactation consultant and midwife who continued to encourage me to stick with it - it'll get easier they said, just give it two weeks.
TWO WEEKS, I thought, you've got to be kidding me.
Yeah, I may have been a bit dramatic with my own thoughts, but hey I got through it. I was determined and committed to the process. I even counted down the days to help get through it all mentally. I believed it would get easier and it did. Next thing you know nursing became a very sweet and intimate experience.
I'm sure there are many moms who can relate to the stress around their milk supply dropping. I, too, experienced a drop in my supply. What an emotional roller coaster! It was a feeling of lack because you aren't producing what your LO needs. Through the tears I was still dedicated to the journey. I started off by finding a scripture that I could recite daily. I found Deuteronomy 26:9 "He brought us to this place and gave us this land flowing with milk and honey!". I spoke this over my body while I was nursing, pumping - really every time I thought about it. I would say to my LO "the Lord brought us into this place". The place being motherhood for me and life for my LO. I also researched what other mother's were doing during this time. One article spoke on the importance of surrounding yourself with people who support your nursing desires. Whenever I felt weary or doubtful those people cheered me on to continue pushing through. Faith without works is dead, ya' know! A few other things I tried to rebuild my supply was lactation smoothies, lactation brownies/cookies, yeast powder, mother's milk calorie counting and power pumping. What worked for me was increasing my calorie intake to 2,500 to 2,700 calories a day. Nursing naturally burns a lot of calories plus I was working out 3-4 times a week so I needed more nutritious food in order to produce more. I felt like I was eating all the time but it worked. In addition to increasing my calorie intake, I also drank Organic Mother's Milk and started power pumping. Mother's milk doesn't taste all that great but adding a little honey did the trick for me. I drank the tea 2-3 times a day at least 10-15 minutes before nursing my LO or pumping. I power pumped once a day then increased it twice a day, once in the morning and once at night. *Again, this is just what worked for me. If you're a momma looking to increasing your supply please do what's best for you and your body.* It was a tiring experience. In the morning I would wake up 2 hours before my LO woke, pump off and on for an hour, eat then nurse her. My evening routine included her bedtime feeding, dinner, rest for about 30 minutes then begin pumping for an other hour. It was a sacrifice of time on my end but thankfully my LO reaped the benefits.
These past 14 months haven’t been easy but the journey of nursing is one I would never take for granted. I learned the value of sacrificing my time, my body and my desires in order to best help my LO develop. I made decisions, that weren't always easy, but would help take stress off of me. In many ways, I saw God's hand consistently providing for us both. I'm grateful He is a very present help. The greatest joy throughout this entire journey is the bond built between mother and child. I understand a mother's love differently and I'm only at the beginning of my motherhood journey. I not only learned about myself but I also learned about her. I saw how gracious my LO was with me and her willingness to try new things. She must get that from me, LOL! One of my favorite memories during this time will always be how she would look up at me while nursing and I would hold her so close. Nursing while cuddling brought me great joy. Looking into her beautiful brown eyes brought peace. Telling her I love her grew my heart!
Yeah, she is growing up on me. Yeah, I sure will miss nursing my LO. And even though she will ALWAYS be our baby, its's time officially time to say bye-bye baby and HELLO TINY TOT!
